Hey!
Previously, it used to annoy me that I seemed to waste time a whole lot. I thought I was procrastinating. But it apparently requires me to sit and read and fidget and get exasperated for a few hours, just to make up 1000 words every Sunday morning. Once I made my peace with it, I look forward to this discomfort.
Anyways, on to the 3 things for this week.
on a rite of passage. We all undergo several rites of passage as we grow up. Most are via our religious traditions, like getting married. Many are biological. These exist in the sphere of fitness and I think that reinforcing them and introducing more fanfare could be the way to get a lot of you to acknowledge your transformations.
3 quotes for today feature James Clear, Dan John and Richard Feynman.
on 4 actions you can take to reduce that work stress. This is more of 4 things that I do which you need to contextualise and translate for yourself. And with the added caveat that there’s a bunch of other things I do that you might not do in terms of having a better work-life balance - for example, I spent the past few hours this Sunday morning writing a blog post. Just because I enjoy it and I don’t define it as work does not mean you agree to it.
If you think a friend would find any of these words useful, do share that post with them.
on 4 actions you can take to reduce work stress
Do you find that your days and weeks are a blur? Does it astonish you that we are already a third of the way into the 3rd month of the year?
Do you find that you are wiped out over the week, barely enough time to think about what you've been up to? It is just one thing after the other before you plop down on the couch and watch some TV to take your mind off things. And then keep repeating it until the weekend.
Work never ends. Constantly on calls. Emails at all times of the day. Most of them seem urgent.
I came up with 3 rules for myself, which I think you can adapt to your own context.
#1: Stop working at 5.30 pm
My day starts rather early. I am done with 3 hours of coaching by the time most of you are having your morning coffee. So, even with a mid-day break of lunch and a nap plus some time to unwind, I've found that I am not very productive in the evening. And when I am forced to be, I find that the next morning tends to be rather sluggish.
So, a hard stop at 5.30 pm is a rule that I set for myself. Of course, there are a few days when I might spend a few minutes extra. But the idea is not to schedule work past 5.30 pm.
#2: Minimal phone and zero-WhatsApp over the weekend
A lot of my students want to talk to me and they are only free over the weekends. But then, I get only the weekend to do a few things that are not possible during the week - like hang out with my friends or stay up late and what-not. So, I don't take any calls over the weekend. And WhatsApp is the messaging medium of choice for the community, and I stay away from it as well.
That might seem a bit over the top but to be able to switch off from work and all its related things, I find that a clean break like this is required.
#3: Emails over short windows
I used to have my inbox open all the time. While switching between tasks, I'd quickly check my email. When I open my phone to do something else, I check to see if there's an urgent email to respond to.
Again, this meant that my mind was constantly distracted and occupied by work. This might sound like a good thing but when it comes time to switch off, our habits lead us astray. You are gonna be opening that email or responding to WhatsApp before you realise it.
So, I have 2-3 windows during the day when I chip away at my email. And right before I close my laptop down around 5.30 pm is my last check.
#4: 25-on-5-off aka the Pomodoro method
If you are like me, you are constantly opening up a browser window and dicking around on the internet. Any time you are stuck with a problem, I have this terrible habit of doing this. Without my knowledge, I'd be re-reading football news that I've already gone through twice. All because I am stuck with a problem.
Instead, shut up and be stuck with the problem.
I use the Pomodoro method for this. I use a timer that runs for 25 minutes. Until that beeper goes, I shut up and plod away at the one task in front of me. If it is "answer emails", that's what it is. If it is "come up with a new fancy diet", that's what it is. Doesn't matter how easy or hard the task is. The focus is to stay on the task.
When the beeper goes, I put a 5-minute timer and dick around on the interwebs. And then, repeat!
What do you do to take care of your work stress?
How do you manage to find balance in your day?
And how do you manage to stay truly productive? And not work silly hours at the same time?
I'd love to hear your process.
3 quotes
The best exercise for gaining strength is not missing workouts.
– James Clear
Why is the author of Atomic Habits talking about lifting, you might think? Besides the obvious reference to consistency and habits. Well, he also happens to be a weightlifter with a 500 lb deadlift from back when he was competing.
Consistency is all there is to it. And well, sensible programming. And lifting heavy. But it starts with getting to the gym.
You are what you ate.
– Dan John
ATE. Past tense.
Consistency is what it comes down to. Did I say that already?
Your current shape (or lack of) is simply a sum of what you've been eating all this time. It doesn't matter much if you are dieting this week - what have you been putting into your mouth the last 20 years?
If you thought that science was certain - well, that is just an error on your part.
– Richard Feynman
on a rite of passage
In almost all cultures, we see a traditional ritual or a rite of passage where "boy becomes a man". Whether it is going on a hunt once you turn a certain age, or getting circumcised, or land diving, it signals a huge transitional moment in life.
I think this applies to how we view ourselves, in the context of health and fitness.
my rite of passage
I was an unfit person for the longest time. And that identity was something I kept reinforcing for a long time. It was not until I enrolled myself in a rite of passage - running a half-marathon - that I started the transformation away from unfit. I did not realise it back then but enrolling in that rite of passage was a crucial step for me. I can clearly see the "before I ran a half-marathon" and "after I ran a half-marathon" versions of myself.
One undergoes a physical and mental transformation. Who you thought you were - well, that person would not do this or be able to. But by the end of it, you are someone new, someone, reborn.
This might sound a tad excessive. I am not comparing this to something as fantastic as hunting a lion or surviving 7 days in the wild in a loincloth and a knife.
But a rite of passage it surely is.
acknowledging the transition
The celebrations and rituals that go with completing a rite of passage seem to help drive home the lesson. I think ancient communities and societies did this rather well. To us, it might seem barbaric and backward but there was a point.
The drawback I can see from my personal journey and that of a lot of my students is that we don't fail to see the huge chasm we've leapt across. We don't acknowledge that transition.
If you tell my 13-year old self what I can deadlift or press today, or the mere fact that I am a strength coach - it would blow that kid's mind away. But silly me living in the present keeps thinking "Sure sure, but I can deadlift a bit more".
I see this with a lot of my students as well. Sure, you've lost a lot of weight or are able to squat when you previously could not but that person next to you at the gym is doing so much more.
new rituals
Over the past decade, there have been interesting new rituals that have entered my life. Benchmark workouts with my training partners, Saturday community workouts, training plans that culminate in pressing half my bodyweight, training for certification, striving for mastery - just so many.
Along the way, other rituals have vanished. Rituals that did not strike a chord or were not relevant any more.
Today, when I chit-chat with fitness-minded folk, we talk about what we lift or something new we learned.
We are all on this side of our journey i.e. somewhere, we've undergone our rite of passage.
These rituals that you choose to put yourself through are powerful and transformative. You can choose to shed your previous conceptions of yourself and start becoming someone else. You are no longer that person you thought you were - you just proved it to yourself.
To really drive the learnings home requires more work. Maybe requires more fanfare. Maybe that's what certifications and what-not try to do but I don't think they do the job.
For a long time, I've been pondering about my own lack of complete belief in my transformation. Seeing it reflected in a lot of my students, I realise that there's a need to acknowledge this.
As long as it is not as painful as getting one's teeth knocked out, it should be fine.
Something for me to think about, and possibly structure into our students' journey.
As always, thanks for spending some of your time reading this. I truly appreciate it.