Hey hey!
Hope your Sunday’s off to a great start.
There’s no audio on this week’s edition as well - I am facing some equipment issues and so the 5 of you who listen to me will need to wait one more week. Thank you for listening, and your patience.
We (my wife and I) got to meet some of our friends after almost a year. It was great to see them and catch up, and reassuring that even though we hadn’t seen each other in forever, it felt the same. Anyways, enough about me. Let’s get on with this.
The 3 things for today.
beating those sugar cravings. If you are like me and have a sweet-tooth, well, I have 7 strategies for you. You can try them out, see what works best for you. And come up with your own as well. Point is, you need a strategy.
3 quotes for today, a couple of which hit a deep nerve personally.
on road rage. It is a silly waste of energy and a source of anger - my road rage. So, I wanted to work on it. Is there anything, like my road rage, that you have and that you'd like to work on? It doesn't have to be big or important - in fact, the smaller it is, the better.
7 strategies to beat that sugar craving of yours
Or maybe it is not sugar. Maybe you like them fried snacks. Well, whatever it is, coming up with some strategies will help you beat them.
#1: a 10-minute timer
Most times, the sugar craving comes after a meal. Coz you are used to dessert, or more likely, we popped in some candy after a meal as a kid. This is just a rather immediate reaction that you do before the brain has even processed what's happening.
I set a 10-minute timer. This is more mental but as I write it, I realise I should just set the timer on my phone as well. Just wait out the timer - go do something else.
Most times, the brain will assert itself and the craving might've dissipated by when the timer goes.
#2: create a hurdle
There's this piece of research that I read about. This is in an office setting - you know, cubicles and all that. What these food and behavioural scientists did was put a bunch of candy in 3 different spots.
within hand's reach of where the person working in the cubicle is.
about 1-2 feet away. It is still in the cubicle but the person has to stand and walk a step towards it.
about 10-20 feet away. Out of the line of sight and a lot more work to get to it.
What they found was the 3rd scenario resulted in the least amount of candy being consumed. Duh! And the first scenario led to a lot of candy consumed. Double duh!
So, create a hurdle for yourself. The best is to get rid of all the treats in your house. The hurdle to order in or go to a store is a reasonable hurdle.
#3: have some ghee
I like ghee, so this works for me. Calorie-dense and rich in fat, a spoonful of ghee seems to get rid of my cravings. You can try a sip of coconut oil if you'd prefer.
This is not the best method but what I've found is that one method is never enough for me.
#4: chew some sugar-free gum
There's a lot of amazing flavours of sugar-free gum out there. It gives your teeth and jaws a good workout (which is good) and checks the sugar box as well.
This is a win-win! And as someone who likes to chew gum, this method works best for me.
#5: make the decision in the morning
If you are like me, it is not a question of if but when you will get that sugar craving. Mondays are the worst because I probably had a good treat on Sunday. You would think that means Monday is the easiest day to say no but funnily, that just makes it harder for me.
So, Monday morning, I tell myself and I write it down sometimes as well - "You are not eating sugar today". And I bookmark when and what I will eat - Saturday, chocolate ice-cream, an extra scoop coz I am being awesome.
Most times, decision fatigue is what kills us. Get ahead of it.
#6: Dark chocolate
Pop in a square of dark chocolate - say something in the 70% or 80% range. The sugar content is low, and it is rich. It will give you the hit of sugar you need with minimal damage.
#7: Sleep
Sleep deprivation will increase your sugar cravings. So, if you find that even with a solid, wholesome meal that you are getting cravings, look at sleep.
None of these strategies is fool-proof. But they are simply strategies to help buy you time and get out of that immediate reaction where you just pop it in. There's not one magical fix - it depends on the situation.
Try these out and be relaxed about it. See what works for you, and when.
The key thing is that you can control that craving. That craving does not own you. Knowing when you want to eat that sugar versus letting it take over is the key thing you are going for.
You are the boss of that sugar!
3 quotes for this week
Is it not a great tragedy that almost all of us are only concerned with how to fit into society or how to reform it?
– Jiddu Krishnamurti
We are made into pattern machines from a young age. We are programmed into doing certain things and exhibiting certain behaviours. I spent many years adrift not having a clue what I wanted to be or do.
Time and space are what helped me open my brain a bit.
But the true question is: "Are you becoming the type of person you want to become?" The first step is not what or how, but who. You need to know who you want to be. Otherwise, your quest for change is like a boat without a rudder.
– James Clear, from Atomic Habits
Even in health and fitness, this deep question is relevant. From my experience, personal and of many of my students, I've seen that we undergo a remarkable transformation of identity. It starts with a what - I want to lose 10 kilos - mostly. But along the way, if we discover the who, good things seem to happen.
Whom the Gods wish to destroy, they first call promising.
– Cyril Connolly
As a stupid kid who got good marks in school and thought he was awesome shit, I completely agree. I wish I had read this quote back then. And more importantly, understood it.
on road rage and conquering thoughtlessness, one small bit at a time
As an unnecessary stressor in my life, road rage has always featured. Having the occasional small-win here has shown me that it is possible to chip away at any problem. It requires awareness and it seems to require a process. There will be a failure and that's the way it is.
For someone who drives as little as me - my commute to work is about 2 km - road rage is just stupid. While I don't yell or shake my fists, I get rather annoyed and passive-aggressive. I've been known to give the finger occasionally.
When I am driving to coach classes at 4.30 am in the morning, one thing I learned was apparently there are no rules. One-ways and traffic lights come into play only after dawn. I have to drive through a one-way (where I go in the right way) for a 200 metre stretch on the main road and pretty much every day, there are vehicles coming down the wrong way. This riles me up and I get rather passive-aggressive about it. I'll flash my lights, I'll drive in the right lane and get rather close to them and force them to slow down. I behave like a complete jerk, basically.
unhealthy and pointless
In one of my chats with my therapist, I was chatting with her about how before I work on larger issues, whatever they might be, shouldn't I be able to rectify silly issues like this pointless road rage? She agreed and thought it'd be a concrete but small thing to tackle.
And then, well, Covid-19 happened and I didn't fancy Zoom sessions with her. Plus, my driving became zero and so the road rage was solved by not being on the road.
But it was one of those things that I had in my head, something I'd like to rectify. I don't think any of us do anything sensible when we are stupidly angry. I've read stories of elite athletes who use anger to motivate them and I've seen a few friends do that as well. But it has never worked for me. Anger only makes me double stupid. I think my stupidity does not need a multiplication factor.
A quote I loved was Thich Nhat Hanh's.
The red light is your friend.
Brilliant! Instead of being annoyed that I didn't sneak in through the yellow, how about I just chill while stuck at a red light? And remind me of what I am trying to work on. Using the red light as a trigger to remind myself was actually an interesting exercise because it kinda worked.
While I can be conscious about it, it is not dissimilar to gobbling a delicious sweet that's just sitting on the table before you realise you are on a diet and today's Monday afternoon and maybe you should wait at least until the evening.
It just happens too quickly.
It might not seem like much, to try and get over this road rage. Especially when I am not getting into fist-fights or randomly crashing my car into someone. But I just felt it is a weakness, or rather, a way to conquer thoughtlessness. If I could tackle thoughtlessness in this defined space, then I could extend it from here on out.
I mean, do you like feeling out of control? Do you enjoy it when your emotions get away from you, in a bad way? And you say or do something sub-par? Of course not.
no honking
About 5+ years ago, I used to get a ride with a friend to go play Ultimate. And I realised something crazy - my friend did not honk his horn. At all! In Madras. What?!?!?!
I couldn't believe it. But here we are, travelling 5 km and back in traffic and this fellow was not using his horn.
I obviously dismissed this outrageous behaviour. It was so far away from normal that I could not even relate to it. I mean, c'mon, are we in the frickin' mid-West and its sparsely populated towns?!
But years later, as this topic was broached by me in my therapy, this memory came back. As I read that quote, it came back. It finally did not seem as outrageous as it did. My friend's extraordinary behaviour made my goal seem rather accessible and possible.
To you, this might seem an unnecessary exercise. I mean, why bother? Especially if we can hire a driver or take an Uber. But that is not the point, for me. Here was an obvious and unnecessary exhibition of not being in control. And if this happens in such a trivial place, then how can I expect to be in control when larger uncontrollables happen? I will only lose my shit.
a process
This has been amongst the harder exercises that I've put myself through. But it has been challenging and interesting. My process seems to involve a few of the following things.
drive slower. If I can brake less and tailgate less, it seems to be a good thing.
telling myself that saving 5 minutes by driving fast doesn't solve anything. It is rather easy to start 5-10 minutes early and get somewhere earlier.
When (not if) I get annoyed by someone's behaviour on the road, I try to remind myself that I too have done things like that. And I probably did something like that not too long ago - I was probably oblivious to it that it didn't register.
use the red light as my friend, to remind myself what I am trying to do.
work on my breathing and posture, and staying physically relaxed when I am driving.
While I am nowhere close to a 100% success rate, the amount of road rage and anger and frustration when I drive has come down noticeably. And this has definitely played a huge factor in my mood going into wherever I am headed to. Whereas previously I would still be a bit annoyed or preoccupied or day-dreaming about how I should've broken that idiot's taillights, well, I seem to be a wee bit calmer.
As an unnecessary stressor in my life, road rage has always featured. Having the occasional small-win here has shown me that it is possible to chip away at any problem. It requires awareness and it seems to require a process. There will be multiple failures and that's the way it is.
For those of you who made it this far, how about we go a bit further? Is there anything, like my road rage, that you have and that you'd like to work on? It doesn't have to be big or important - in fact, the smaller it is, the better. I'd love it if you wrote back and shared, but even if you don't, if the thought has sprouted in your head, that's great.
Thanks for reading.
I’d love it if you can share ONE of these posts with ONE friend of yours, who you think will benefit from it.
If you have any thoughts or feedback, I’d love to hear from you.
Have a great Sunday, and I’ll see you next week.