Hi there!
Hope you are having a great weekend. Here are the 3 things I have in store for you today.
a story about an amazingly strong student of mine and how I wish I could’ve communicated that to her better.
3 quotes, featuring Steven Pressfield, Bruce Lee and Thich Nhat Hanh.
5 things that I’d like my parents to do about their health and lifestyle. Maybe it’d be relevant to you if you’ve banged your head against that wall in your family.
an amazingly strong woman and her search
I had a student, MS - about 40 years old and a mom. Like all of us, a busy life.
But never made any excuses about showing up at the gym or putting in the work.
Sacrificed sleep, if needed, to slog it out at the gym.
One day, we were testing out pushups and she did 25 of them! The most strong, gorgeous, perfect pushups that you can see. Twenty five!
But in her head, she could do better. The pushups were not the main bit that she wanted - she wanted something else.
I think lofty goals and high standards are great. The more successful people I encounter, the higher the standards they set. But something I've also observed in my interactions is that there's a line between having high standards and unrealistic expectations. This tends to happen especially in two cases.
when we have expectations that are too far out, compared to the effort we are putting in. This was not MS' issue as the effort was brilliant.
when we keep moving the goalposts and want something else, anything else, except what we have.
Strength was not an issue. In fact, she's probably stronger than 99% of the women out there. Endurance, movement quality, agility, skill - likewise.
The person who finishes last in the 100m Olympic finals is still the 8th fastest in the frickin' world.
She was just unable to get to what she thought she should get to - unrealistic portrayals that the media today propagates.
At that time, I couldn’t clearly communicate what I wanted to. I thought I’d at least try to do that today. Here goes.
Celebrate your successes more. Real ones. You have a lot of them.
Be kind to yourself. The gym is not a scoreboard. Life is not a scoreboard. And if we are keeping track, the scoreboard reads "25 pushups in a set!". If that's not awesome, I genuinely do not know what awesome means.
Look at yourself from someone else's eyes.
Strength is under-rated. You are amazingly strong! On top of a strength base, you can do everything that you want.
Maybe this is relevant to you. Maybe you think that if you get 25 pushups, you’d be happy. As long as we are searching for something inappropriate or irrelevant (and most of us are), we won’t.
While I write this for MS, this is as much for me.
3 quotes for this week
If Resistance couldn't be beaten, there would be no Fifth Symphony, no Romeo and Juliet, no Golden Gate Bridge. Defeating Resistance is like giving birth. It seems absolutely impossible until you remember that women have been pulling it off successfully, with support and without, for fifty million years.
- Steven Pressfield
It is as easy as not giving in. It is as difficult as we make it.
The point is the doing of them rather than the accomplishments. There is no actor but the action; there is no experiences but the experience.
- Bruce Lee
Effort over results. Journey over the destination. Do the work. It is not about you but the work.
If you ask a child, "Why are you eating chocolate?", the child would likely answer "Because I like it."
There's no purpose in eating the chocolate. Suppose you climb a hill and stand on top to look around. You might feel quite happy standing on the hill. There's not a reason for doing it. Sit in order to sit. Stand in order to stand. There is no goal or aim in sitting.
Do it because it makes you happy.
– Thich Nhat Hanh
I love his writing. Most meditation or Zen stuff just goes way over my head. Or is just brutally simple and complex like Bruce Lee's stuff that it takes me a while to unpack. Hanh writes simply. It makes sense to me. I know what he's saying and guiding me towards.
Do it because it makes you happy. If there's only one piece of life advice, I think this might be it.
5 things that I’d like my parents to do about their health
As I look around at the elders in my family, they are afflicted with “old age” health issues.
Most, if not all, are simply due to poor lifestyle - minimal activity, terrible eating, and not taking care of oneself.
What might be accessible and possible to get them to do? Well, here’s my attempt at it.
5 things they can do
Walk for 30 minutes a day.
Walking is wonderful for health and accessible. The minimum dose is 30 minutes a day but more will work as well.
If walking is not possible because of joint pain, that's a simple red flag. Get that looked at immediately. Fix that issue. Get ambulatory.Eat lesser than usual.
A significant portion of our daily intake is unnecessary - if they've steadily put on weight over the years, it is simply because calories consumed is higher than calories expended. Gradually, we just eat a bit more here and there and then that becomes the norm.
Eating 20% lesser is a good goal to have and this can be accomplished in multiple ways. Here's two - eating more vegetables and eating slower.Sleep 7+ hours and a nap.
If sleep is disturbed, needs to be looked at. Are they snoring and suffering from sleep apnea? Time to talk to an expert (doctor) about.
Catching up on sleep over the weekend and all that is untrue and doesn't work. Getting a sleep tracker might be a great idea.Track blood work and measurements.
Weekly track bodyweight and waist measurements.
Every 3 months, track lipid profile (cholesterol levels) and blood sugar (including HbA1C) at least.See a doctor - eye, dentist, and a general physician - at least once a year.
And a bonus - get a pet. Coz pets are awesome.
If you can get your parents to focus on these things as a start, it can lead to them taking control of their health and lifestyle.
It is hard for us to stick to our habits and move forward on our fitness journey. It is definitely a lot harder for people like our parents. But that does not mean it can be neglected.
If there's one takeaway from this post, it is that getting older is not the same as getting unhealthier. Anything can be worked on and improved.
As always, thank you for your time. I’ll see you here next week!
