Hey there!
Hope your Sunday is going well. I had a break from my usual Sunday morning schedule - normally the first few hours of Sunday are me, coffee, reading, writing down brilliant ideas (that funnily lose their brilliance in 24 hours), and writing my blog post. I met and hung out with my family for a couple of hours this morning. Which was great, especially because I haven’t done it in a while. Let’s leave the but out of it, shall we!
On to the 3 posts for today,
There are no shortcuts. The successful path to mastering anything is to practice for the sake of it, to enjoy it, and enjoy being on a plateau.
Reading George Leonard’s book last year, especially the section about the 3 types of people just made so many things fall into place. I wrote about it because I am sure you will recognise yourself there as well. I wrap up the series with the fourth post, but here’s the first (Dabbler), second (Obsessive), and third (Hacker).3 quotes, as always. From Thich Nhat Hanh, and one from George Leonard. And a powerful one about framing, by Anthony de Mello.
on subbing out rice/wheat from your plate for superior alternatives like quinoa/millets. Should you? Should you not? Does it matter?
Let’s do this!
pick one thing to get on the path of Mastery
a powerful lens
The lens of looking at things I do via these 3 persona types is a powerful tool, personally. I was able to look across many years and episodes and learn a lot more about my failures. Why did something not go well or why did I not achieve what I set out to achieve? From my failed diets and attempts at getting fit in my early 20s, to failed projects that I've worked on. I was also able to understand better why I succeeded in places where I previously thought it was attributed to a lot of luck.
Equally importantly, can I shine this lens at myself currently? And see where I am using the wrong persona for the job? And can I pick one thing, to begin with, where I'd like to switch up the persona? Well, the answer was pretty obvious.
here's my thing
Writing - I am a hack. And that's something I'd like to change. I'd like to communicate my ideas better and work on my writing and editing skills. Plus, whatever zillion things go into writing that I have no idea about. I've found putting my ideas on (digital) paper over the past few months to be tremendously useful and I don't think a hacker is the right persona for this particular endeavour of mine.
wax on, wax off
I am not going to stop with this one thing, as that's not the point. Any place where I am doing a rushed job, where I am phoning it in, where I can do lesser but better - all of these are places to look into. Any place where I'd like improved results - at work as a leader, as a coach, or as a husband, or a friend - what I learned was to shift the mindset. It is obviously a work in progress and it will be for a long time to come and that's something I am looking forward to. The following excerpt, which I will end this article with, beautifully brought about this realisation. As a kid, I didn't learn anything from wax-on-wax-off. But maybe, now I can.
Take dishwashing, for example. You can perform that chore in a hurried and haphazard way, with your main goal being to get it behind you as quickly as possible. Or you can do it as a meditation, a dance.
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Go for efficiency, elegance, and grace in your motions; avoid hasty shortcuts. Rather than thinking about getting the job finished and going on to something else, stay wholly focused on the moment, on the task at hand. Above all, don't hurry.
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Life is filled with opportunities for practicing the inexorable, unhurried rhythm of mastery, which focuses on process rather than product, yet which, paradoxically, often ends up creating more and better products in a shorter time than does the hurried, excessively goal-oriented rhythm that has become standard in our society. Making this rhythm habitual takes practice.
There are no shortcuts. The successful path to mastering anything is to practice for the sake of it, to enjoy it, and enjoy being on a plateau.
3 quotes for this week
We're in such a rush, looking for happiness in one place and then another. We walk like sleepwalkers, without any enjoyment of what we are actually doing. We are walking, but in our minds we are already doing something else: planning, organising, worrying. There is no more need to run. Every time we return our attention to our breath and our steps, it's as if we wake up. Every step brings us back to the here and the now. We can touch the Earth and see the sky and notice all the wonders in between. In each step there is the possibility of mindfulness, concentration, and insight.
--Thich Nhat Hanh
Since last March, I've been reading a lot of Thich Nhat Hanh and practising meditation and mindfulness. From being completely and utterly clueless, I have advanced to "mostly clueless". A year ago, the above quote would've made no sense to me. But today, I've tried some simple drills to ensure I don't get carried away all the time - which still happens but the win is that I recognise it and thus it happens lesser. Something as simple as a bell ringing every 30 minutes (there's an app for that) and I pause and take 2 breaths has been wonderful punctuation to my day.
Walking is a hard battle. I always seem to find myself rushing, wanting to get out of the noise or the heat. Or putting something on and shutting the world out. Like dishwashing, this is a frontier I hope to understand better.
Something has upset you. Did you hear that expression? Something has upset you. That's the way the English language is. That's the way all languages are. "Something upset me." Nothing upset you. The accurate way to speak would be, "I upset myself on the occasion of something." But who speaks like that? You say, "You upset me." No. "Your behaviour caused me to get upset." We hate that, don't we? We love to make the world responsible, or people responsible, or life responsible, or God responsible: "You did it." Not the upset.
– Anthony de Mello
How we frame things is so powerful. Framing things, not guilting ourselves or blaming others, and taking responsibility and just letting go. As I hover in "mostly clueless", the few times when I do some of these things, my mind is blown.
Early in life, we are urged to study hard, so that we'll get good grades. We are told to get good grades so that we'll graduate from high school and get into college. We are told to graduate from high school and get into college so that we'll get a good job. We are told to get a good job so that we can buy a house and a car. Again and again we are told to do one thing only so that we can get something else. We spend our lives stretches on an iron rack of contingencies.
– George Leonard, in Mastery
Keep your options open is another term. How long are you gonna keep your options open? It is well-meaning but ultimately silly advice, I think. I am in my third career. Closing my options by studying computer science did not close anything. Whatever relevant principles I learned there are still useful today. The actuals are useless but then, they were obsolete anyway. Further closing my options by doing an MS in Interaction Design, something no one knew much about 16 years ago, was the gateway to opening my mind. I think everything feeds into everything else. Mindlessly being a drone is the issue. Whatever we do, as long as we are not a hacker, or a dabbler, or an obsessive - it will arm you well for whatever we are gonna do next.
on subbing out rice/wheat
mental models
Of the zillion wonderful things I learned at grad school, the concept of mental models was one. From James Clear,
A mental model is an explanation of how something works. The phrase “mental model” is an overarching term for any sort of concept, framework, or worldview that you carry around in your mind.
Mental models help you understand life. For example, supply and demand is a mental model that helps you understand how the economy works.
[...]
Mental models also guide your perception and behavior. They are the thinking tools that you use to understand life, make decisions, and solve problems.
[...]
Mental models are imperfect, but useful.
We need mental models. And we have a bunch of them already and we use them in our lives. As James Clear says, they are not perfect. But they don't have to be. Abstracting away most of the details is precisely one of the uses of mental models, as it helps us navigate situations.
We try a shortcut or a flawed method due to multiple reasons. One of them is a flawed mental model. We have the wrong conception about how something works and so when we try to implement that method, we don't get the desired result.
n=1
I learn from my students quite a bit. I steal liberally from them and add them to my toolbox. Many of their approaches are quite inspiring and perfect for the n=1 scenario they are in. Broadening that as a coaching lesson for the rest of my students is an interesting challenge, as while we are unique, many of the situations we face are eerily similar.
For example, here are a few things most of us struggle with today.
Working too much. Being too busy.
Stress eating.
Ordering in too much.
Not getting enough sleep.
Not eating enough of the good stuff.
I learn from their struggles and failures as well. I learn from the shortcuts they attempt. In all probability, it is a shortcut I've tried many years ago. Ah, I could write 100 threads on the silly things I've tried. But I digress.
solution provider or coach?
When I was younger, I thought my job was to provide solutions. I realise now that it is about helping them solve their problems. If they are unable to wake up, the solution is "Go to bed on time. Don't dick around on Netflix. Wake up when the alarm rings. Show up to class". Solved. Except it is about as useful as stock market advice that goes "Buy low. Sell high." Guiding them to figuring their solutions always leave me learning quite a bit, and I love these conversations.
Sometimes, I find an approach that they take due to a flawed mental model. Which is a great coaching opportunity. Previously, my reaction was to say "Wrong!" and "No, that won't work." or "Here's why that won't work." But the more powerful approach here is to find the right mental model that can replace the flawed one.
let's find a better substitute for rice
Replace rice with millets and/or quinoa.
Folks seem to do this because of a combination of the following thought process.
rice does not have that many nutrients.
rice makes you fat.
rice makes you unhealthy.
quinoa/millets have more nutrients than rice.
If we were playing trump cards, then yes, quinoa would beat rice. And yep, so would millets. But the flaw in reasoning is we need to improve on the grain factor on our plate as an isolated matter.
To be clear, there's no harm in doing this. Not at all. I am not trying to nitpick. But having sambhar with quinoa is ugh! If the idea is to have more nutrients, then there's a simpler way to go about it.
Why do we have grains on our plate? Why do we eat idli/dosai/rice/roti etc? And why is that the centrepiece? The reason they are on our plates is primarily as a source of energy. There was a time when calories were hard to come by, so humans needed access to many of it. Plonk that grain and solve that problem. Cost/calorie as well dictated that rice (and grains) made up the majority of the plate.
But you are making this decision to increase nutritional value. Right? So, stop trying to look at one piece of your plate - just look at the entire plate.
instead, do this
Construct a more balanced plate. A simple guideline I use with my students is to have an equal amount of vegetables and rice. Have room for one more guideline? Have some protein with each meal. These two changes alone will vastly improve the success of what you are trying to do - improve the nutrient density of your meals. In addition to ensuring you don't eat waste calories (most of us eat more than we need and grains are often the culprit).
The quinoa for rice reminds me of an anecdote from one of Pavel's books. I am paraphrasing here. This western economist goes to the communist USSR (back in the day). He's being given the grand tour by a Soviet politician who proudly explains the success of the communist system. When the westerner remarks on the manual labourers digging trenches with shovels by the road and ask why machines are not being used, the politician responds proudly by saying they are providing labour for the people. The economist retorts that if they want to do just that, then just replace the shovels with spoons.
Rice is not the problem. Carbs are not the problem. Fats are not the problem. Most times, you trying to avoid the obvious path is the problem.
So, eat more vegetables. Eat some protein. Drink some water.
Figure out the right mental model for problems you are facing, and you will find your own, unique and powerful solution.
And that’s that for this week’s edition. Thanks for giving me some of your time.
